As if this past school year wasn’t enough, now you’re dealing with summer school. UGH!

In spite of your best efforts to get your teen up, completing and handing in assignments, they failed a course (or two). It’s like they got lazy, gave up and stopped trying.

This WILL NOT happen again!

You’ve laid down the law so your teen understands this isn’t a joke or dress rehearsal. You’ve limited or removed all technology time, no sleepovers, limited EVERYTHING so they understand you’re serious and they’re going to take it seriously too.

Hold on there, Sherriff. Stand down.

When their self-esteem is already in their boots, those consequences feel like punishment, shame and isolation.

Your teen hates the thought of summer school as much as you do! They didn’t try to fail anything and would much rather have passed. Summer school is a lasting reminder of how they failed your expectations and theirs.

You can’t consequence your teen to care.

Your teen was coping with such significant and sudden changes that didn’t give them time to adjust or work with their learning style. They got in over their heads and had no strategies or coping techniques to pull the brakes on that runaway train they felt trapped in. Your teen never stopped caring.

Policing your teen and their assignments isn’t supporting their independence and responsibility. It reinforces being a failure and they aren’t capable or smart enough to do it.

Have you ever tried getting out of a tough situation when that’s how you’re feeling about yourself?

But what if they fail again?

What if?

“But if I don’t stay on them, they won’t do it!”

Maybe. Failing one class isn’t going to ruin their life and have them living under a bridge or in a van down by the river. Many very successful people didn’t even finish school.

What might your teen’s grades or performance say about you as a parent? What’s your story about failure?

I know you love your teen and you want the best for them. You believe in them and find it frustrating to watch them struggle when they don’t seem to be trying. This is hard and you’re doing everything you know how to help.

Encourage over motivate.

Your teen wants to know they matter as much to you as their grades. They’re struggling to stay afloat and what they want is to know you love them unconditionally and beyond any external measure of value like a percentage or letter.

Your teen desperately needs encouragement, not micromanagement.

Here’s 10 strategies to conquer summer school with your teen.

Are you feeling exhausted and hopeless despite reading all the books, listening to podcasts, and even taking programs?

You’re trying to implement the tools and skills the experts are sharing (even what your friends and family say you should be doing 🙄 ) to create a better relationship with your teen, yet things just feel hard and you’re starting to wonder if you’re missing something.

If you’re craving more personal support to get the specific answers you need to turn your relationship with your teen around, you’re in the right place.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.