Russia invades Ukraine.
I sat on the edge of the bed in shock and started to cry. There’s already so much sadness and pain in the world, like the laws in Texas and Florida, and now this. It all feels like too much when I feel drained, so what can I do?
A few days ago, Dr. Brené Brown sent an email with this quote from her mother that perfectly said what I needed to hear.
“Don’t look away. Don’t look down.
Don’t pretend not to see hurt.
Look people in the eye.
Even when their pain is overwhelming.
And when you’re hurting and in pain, find people who can look you in the eye.
We need to know we’re not alone—especially when we’re hurting.”
Hurt people, hurt people.
Hurt feelings left unheard turn to anger and when neither of those have a safe place to see the light, feel heard and witnessed, they grow, getting turned on others and spreading like a virus.
We need to feel seen and validated in our pain, not shunned, shamed, or stuff those feelings away because they’re ‘negative’ and uncomfortable for you or others to be with.
While on vacation I thought a lot about what I can do with what I’ve been given, and one word popped into my head.
“We need to know we’re not alone—especially when we’re hurting.” Dr. Brené Brown’s mom
Healthy relationships support us to be whole, healed people and I believe that starts at home. The gap between parents and teens has never been greater and teens are struggling more than ever.
Your teen is desperate to feel heard. They’re acting out and pushing back in defiance because they’re hurting and don’t know how to ask for what they need. Ok, they struggle to even know what they need in the first place. The hurt of the world is showing up in their social feed and they feel helpless and scared.
“Listening is balm for the spirit.” – Aly Pain
When you experience feeling witnessed in a safe place by a trusted person, you’re more likely to process, heal from and release feelings before they build up and run you, or end up come out all over those close to you.
Listening is a simple, powerful, and free tool to witness your teen and create powerful connection. Listening without interruption, correction, judgement, or fixing.
If there’s one thing I know, it’s that intentional action creates powerful, positive results.
Click below to register for my FREE masterclass and learn my 3 pillars for creating an honest, connected relationship that lasts a lifetime, WITHOUT having to be a perfect parent.
You’re not alone. We can make a difference starting at home.