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Mamas, I know you love your kids!

Doing stuff for them like cooking and cleaning is one of the ways that you show that. Of course it is! And we all love to be needed. It’s human.

My question is when does your need to be needed get in the way of your child learning to be independent?

As a teenager, I would have loved if my mother did everything for me, but she still showed me how to cook and clean and helped me when I needed it (I hated cooking as a teenager!).

Here’s the part I need you to know –

When I went away to university from a small town to a huge city and living in residence, I knew how to take care of myself – how to cook, and how to clean. And I was one of the only 18-year-olds that knew that! 

So in an otherwise very anxiety-provoking transition in life, I could just worry about my homework and have the confidence to know I was going to be okay. And what mattered was I learned that at home, not months before I left…. way back when I was a teen.

I’m taking some heat for mom shaming here and I get you might hear me that way.

Please understand I respect you enough to challenge you, and I have the best interest of you AND your teen at heart.

Watching our kids grow up and learn to be independent is rewarding and pulls on our heart strings. Slowing down (or stopping) the process doesn’t make it easier later on. Independence builds confidence and confident kids are scientifically proven to be happier and more successful in life. That’s worth it, right?

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